“I Had a Man”
By Dorothea Lasky
Today when I was walking
I had a man tell me as he passed
That I was a white bitch (he was white)
And to not look at him
Or he was going to ‘fuck me in my little butthole’
I wandered away
Who is to say
I think I am a white bitch
My butt is big
But I believe my butthole is little
This violence that we put on women
I don’t think it’s crazy
Someone I know said
‘Oh, that man was crazy’
I don’t think he was crazy
Maybe he could tell I had a look in my eye
That wasn’t crazy anymore
Maybe he could feel the wild cool blood in me
And it frightened him
And he lashed out in fear
Maybe he knew I was the same as him
But had been born with this kind face and eyes
What about the day I left
What happened then
Still I’m glad he said that to me
Still I’m glad he was so cruel to me
What bitter eye knew I had a voice
To say what men have done to me
What unkind wind has blown thru my brain
To make me speak for the wretched
To speak wretchedly about the ugly
To make my own face ugly and simple
To contort this simple smile into a haunting song
Dorothea Lasky’s poetry reminds me that there is everything and nothing scary about being a girl, being complicated, being vast and containing multitudes. Her new book, Thunderbird, came out on Tuesday from Wave Books and this poem and other beauty poems are in it.
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"Platinum Setting" Z!nk May 2008 by Jamie Nelson
"Do you remember? Do you remember being solid? Do you remember life before the hole? Before you were empty and needed to be filled? There was a time when everything was enough. There was a time you didn’t try to get out of your own skin. Remember?"
"I’d try to explain that it’s not really negativity or sadness anymore, it’s more just this detached, meaningless fog where you can’t feel anything about anything — even the things you love, even fun things — and you’re horribly bored and lonely."
الخمرُ مقارنةً بِعينيكِ ماءٌ مثلج.